Subject
xe
Object
xem
Possessive
xyr
Possessive (alone)
xyrs
Reflexive
xemself
Said like: zee / zem / zeer (rhymes with here); some say ksee
Xe/xem is one of the older neopronouns and one of the most used. It fills the third-person slot the way he or she does, without saying which. Xe went home. I saw xem. That coat is xyrs.
Most people who use it are non-binary, but the pronoun does not tell you what someone is. It tells you what to call them. If a colleague's signature says xe/xem, that is the whole instruction.
In a sentence
Xe left early because xe had a train to catch.
I lent xem my charger and xe gave it back the next day.
Xyr coat is the blue one on the hook; the grey one is xyrs too, and xe packed both xemself.
How to use them
- Singular verbs, like he and she: xe is, xe has, xe does. Never "xe are".
- The object form is xem. "I called xem", not "I called xe".
- The possessive splits like his and hers: xyr before a noun (xyr bag), xyrs on its own (the bag is xyrs).
- Slipped up? Say the right word and carry on: "she — xe — is coming." A long apology hands the work back to xem.
- In writing, xe stays lowercase mid-sentence, like he.
Ways to practise
- Read one paragraph about a friend out loud, swapping in xe, xem and xyr. The mouth learns faster than the eyes.
- Add "(xe/xem)" after the person's name in your phone contacts. You will see it every time they call.
- Pick a character from a book and narrate their day with xe/xem for a week. No audience, no stakes.
Where it came from
Recorded, with a caveat. Wiktionary and Pronouns.page both credit Don Rickter, who used xe in a Unitarian Universalist publication in 1973, and Wiktionary adds that the word was "apparently independently invented by several people". So Rickter is the earliest name on record, not the sole inventor.
Who uses them
Identities whose pages mention this set. A pronoun never tells you what someone is — this is only where the word turns up.
Questions people ask
Is xe pronounced with an x sound?
Usually not. The common pronunciation is "zee", with "zem" and "zeer" for the other forms. Some people say "ksee". If you are not sure how a particular person says it, ask; they have been asked before.
Can I just use they for someone who uses xe?
If they have said they/them is also fine, yes. If they have listed xe/xem only, then they is a near miss rather than a hit. It is closer than he or she. It is still not what they asked for.