Subject
ne
Object
nem
Possessive
nir
Possessive (alone)
nirs
Reflexive
nemself
Said like:
Ne/nem sits in the same slots as he/him and she/her. Ne is at work. Text nem. Nir desk is by the window. Nothing about the sentence changes except the word.
It is less common than xe or ze, so you will probably meet it in writing first: a profile, a bio, a signature. That is fine. You learn it the way you learned that "whom" exists, by seeing it and then using it.
In a sentence
Ne is going to be late, so start without nem.
Nir keys are on the table and the phone next to them is nirs.
Ne booked the table nemself.
How to use them
- Singular verbs: ne is, ne has, ne does.
- Nem is the object. Nir before a noun, nirs on its own. Nemself for the reflexive, one word.
- There is a variant, ne/nir, where nir is also the object. Same subject, different middle; check which the person uses.
- How is it said? Ask. "How do you say your pronouns?" is a normal question, and people who use ne/nem get it a lot.
- Correct yourself in one breath. "He — ne — is coming." Then carry on with the actual sentence.
Ways to practise
- Write the five words in a row on a sticky note: ne, nem, nir, nirs, nemself. Look at it for a week.
- Narrate one thing the person did today, in your head, using all five forms. It takes twenty seconds.
- Add ne and nem to your phone dictionary. Autocorrect will otherwise turn nem into new or men.
Where it came from
The origin isn't reliably recorded. Pronouns.page lists the set with no history, and the community wikis we tried to check were unreachable when this page was written, so no name or date is given here.
Questions people ask
Is ne/nem the same as ne/nir?
No. They share ne as the subject, but ne/nem uses nem as the object while ne/nir uses nir. Pronouns.page lists them as two sets. Go by the one the person actually wrote.
Where does ne/nem come from?
Nobody has a reliable answer. Some sets have a named coiner and a date; this one does not have one we could confirm. That does not make it less real to the people using it.