These two are not rivals. Non-binary is the umbrella for any gender that man and woman do not cover: both, neither, partly, or something those two words do not reach. Transmasculine is a direction: almost always raised as a girl, heading masculine, with "man" an option rather than a requirement.
They answer different questions. One is about where you are relative to the two big words. The other is about which way you are travelling. Trans men sit under transmasculine and mostly not under non-binary. Plenty of non-binary people are not heading anywhere masculine at all. And a large share of transmasculine people are exactly both.
How to tell them apart
- Ask whether there is a direction. Non-binary can sit completely still, or lean nowhere. If you daydream about the flat chest, the shoulders, the jaw, there is a direction, and it has a name.
- Ask what you were assigned. Transmasculine is nearly always used by people raised as girls. Non-binary makes no claim about where you started.
- Ask what "mate" from a stranger does. If it lands like a hand on your back, that is the transmasc bit. If you would rather nobody landed on anything, that is the umbrella without the direction.
More likely Non-Binary
- You tried being fully a man, and fully a woman, in your head, and found each wrong in a different direction rather than right.
- You have no picture at all of how you want to look, and a very clear list of how you do not.
- You want away from femininity but not towards masculinity — the dial at zero.
More likely Transmasculine
- "Not a woman" was the easy half to work out. "Man" is still open, and you have stopped waiting for it to close before you do anything.
- You have had a tab open on top surgery at 2am and closed it fast, like it was something else.
- People keep offering you softer words for it, and each one is a size too small.
When both words are honestly available
- Common, and one of the main reasons the word transmasculine exists. You can want a flat chest, a beard, he/him and a low voice, and still not be a man.
- Many people use non-binary in public and transmasc where it matters. Nobody hands out a certificate for holding both, and you will meet people in both directions who think you should pick. You do not have to.
What people get wrong
Transmasculine means you are half-committed — not a real trans man.
It is an umbrella, not a ranking. Some people under it are men, some are non-binary, and neither group is doing a lesser version of it.
Non-binary people cannot want hormones or surgery.
Some want a lot, some want nothing, most want a specific short list. Nobody has to prove something with their body before they are allowed a word about themselves.
Questions people ask
- Can you be transmasculine and non-binary at the same time?
- Yes, and a large share of transmasculine people are exactly that. Masculine is a direction. Man is one possible address on that road, not the whole road. You can want the hormones, the chest surgery and he/him while "man" still feels like an overstatement.
- Is transmasculine the same as non-binary?
- No. Non-binary says you are not simply a man or a woman and says nothing about which way you lean. Transmasculine adds the direction and is nearly always used by people raised as girls. A trans man is transmasculine without being non-binary; an agender person assigned female can be non-binary without being transmasculine. The overlap is large, the words are not interchangeable.